(sciessors image credit: Flickr)
I believe I've mentioned that I have zero crafty skills. My children have been known to exclaim in shock over any decorative idea that accidentally turns out well ("Mommy! You did that?"), and to suggest that mending projects be farmed out to friends ("Maybe Miss Ryann could sew it for us...")
So last week, when I was out shopping and hit an autumnal decor conundrum in searching for wreaths to hang on our garage light fixtures, unable to find any that didn't include smiling scarecrow faces or phrases like 'Happy Fall, Y'all!', I texted a friend, and this conversation took place:
Me: "Why do nice fall wreaths not exist that aren't trying too hard to be cute?"
Friend: "Oh. Well, because you need to make your own."
Me: "Hmm. Then I'm in trouble, aren't I?"
Things looked brighter for my sad, unadorned garage, however, upon a quick internet search that afternoon. The thing about Pinterest and do-it-yourself blogs is that, sure, some postings make people like me feel like a cave person because I can't do this or this or even this, but the online world is also making room for those of us who can't look at a sewing machine without breaking into a cold sweat with memories of seventh grade home ec class and futile attempts to thread the bobbin.
I queried the words "easy fall wreath" or something and after enduring the sight of several self-esteem-wrecking examples, including some sort of "easy" quilted masterpiece (how nice for you, lady), I found a few tutorials for rag wreaths. Which I didn't realize were even a thing.
Description: "Make your own rag wreath - no skill required."
Me: "Oh my gosh, that's me! I have no skills!"
So, I was soon headed to Hobby Lobby, where I wandered the fabric section for awhile, nervous that the crafting experts would sense my fear and know I was miles away from my natural habitat (otherwise known as the already-made decor aisles of Target), and finally selected four or five fall-ish fabrics that I hoped would work together. After feigning confidence in my decisions over yardage so that pincushion-wrist lady wouldn't suspect I was trying out a no-skill project, I grabbed a couple of wreath frames, checked out, and headed for home, stopping to borrow my friend's pinking shears (because why would I own those?).
Friends, listen to me when I tell you this...the Internet is a wondrous place. And I have proof. For the very same person who was responsible for this lovely scene in our laundry room last year...
...now has two of these displayed outside.
ATTENTION, EVERYONE! I HAVE CRAFTED!
Mark was pretty impressed with all of this too, when he came home to find me gleefully finishing up the second wreath and proclaiming, "Look what I made! Me! I made this!"
His pride only waned slightly when he saw the Hobby Lobby receipt a few days later.
Mark: "Wait, that wreath stuff cost us how much?"
Me: "Yes, but remember - I made them myself!"